Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
