I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Randomize
