he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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