Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
