i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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