how can u be prego again
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
