i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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