I don't usually arrange sex via text message
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
