brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
