FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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