Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
