she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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