you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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