Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
