You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
i've created a new STD.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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