Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
