Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
