when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
false alarm. still invincible.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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