are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
