Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize