i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
