Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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