I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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