There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
