what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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