I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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