its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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