Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
