I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
