How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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