All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize