the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
