they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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