What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
