I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
