But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize
