There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
