Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
