her vagine was all disorganized.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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