He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
