another moral hangover. fuck.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize