He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
