We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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