Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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