i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
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