Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
