Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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