weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
