I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
