If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize