I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
