real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
